As many know, I love being a mentor. Recently I was invited to train a group of coaches/mentors. Instead of spending most of the time giving tips, I shared mistakes I've made as a mentor. I've definitely learned and am still learning. Here are my 3 biggest mistakes. And trust me there are more than 3. (I'll share successes and Tips, soon). MISTAKE 1. I said YES to every person who wanted me to mentor him/her. Confession: At one time I was (trying) to mentor over 50 people at one time...And I don't mean group mentoring. That is WAY too many! - I now have boundaries, have an interview process, and have a certain number under which I (try to) stay MISTAKE 2. I thought I had to solve all of their problems. I thought I had all of the answers. I had to be everything for everyone all of the time. With this, I made myself into an idol. Someone once shared with me that a friend told her "Girl, your friends don't need Jesus, because they have you" OUCH!!! Although she was sharing this as her story, that applied to me as well. -Doing my best to make sure I keep myself off of the pedestal MISTAKE 3. Prior to 2014, my mentees never saw me rest. And I mean NEVER! And as a result, I saw a few of them get sick. Why did they get sick? Because they saw me going and going, never resting and I'm sure thought "Well if Dr. G is doing this much, I am suppose to be as well." What they didn't do was factor in that they had some other life things going on that I didn't, the didn't factor in rest and didn't factor in that we all have different capacities. Some of us can only work on one project at a time (I don't mean multitask). Also about 2 years ago, my brother in law said "You don't really know how to rest" I said "I'm getting better" He said "Weeeell, every time you come to hang out, you're always leaving to go to an engagement" And in that moment, I thought "Aw nah! I don't want that to be the impression and memory I leave my nephews." - I now rest. I really do (shoot! I woke from a good nap a few hrs ago) I wonder if any of you can relate. If you are a mentor, parent and more, please be mindful of these things. Also, what mistakes have you made?? © Dr. Kristen Guillory and Kristenguillory.com, 2020. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Dr. Kristen Guillory and kristenguillory.com with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
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